Something I've lived most of my career by is the three-month rule: the idea that most adversity or stress at work goes away within a three month period. And after three months, usually you can assume the problem isn't going away.

So how does this help with anything?

🙏 You can put up with a lot for three months.

The three-month rule actually helps me keep calm during times of change or stress. Whether you're going through...

• an acquisition/merger, and you don't know what the future of the product looks like

• a team change, and you don't have great relationships yet

• a restructure or major process change, and you don't know if it's working yet

Odds are, after three months this will no longer be a problem. So while things are stressful, I remind myself that it won't be like this forever.

✨ Reminder

Of course, sometimes you can't wait things out for three months if they're having a major negative impact on you. But you can still use this framework to think through your next steps.

💪 If it's not going away, is it within your control?

After three months, it's pretty safe to assume things are permanent enough. At this point, you can assess if it's within your control to fix:

• Still don't know what the future of the product will be? Can you propose changes, ask more questions, or get involved in planning?

• Still don't like your new team? Can you be reallocated?

• Still don't think the new process works? Can you influence changes to the process?

If you have any ability to change things, now's the time to make a move.

Waiting for three months is important here because it demonstrates that you've actually tried to make it work. It also means that you won't be escalating every little stress, and it will therefore be taken more seriously.

If it's within your control – great! But if there's nothing you can do about it, what do you do next?

🤬 If it's not in your control, can you tolerate it?

This is the time to think about if you can put up with this. Assuming it's not going away (eg. you can't change your manager, you can't change your team, you can't influence the problem) then you need to make a decision: are you willing to put up with this for the rest of your time here?

• Am I okay with not having full clarity on the roadmap?

• Am I able to work with this team?

• Am I able to work within this process?

This one is a bit more personal, so I'm not going to give much guidance here. But consider: there will always be things about your workplace that you don't like, and this is a pretty nuclear option.

Is there anything that you're struggling with right now that you can now action with the three-month rule? ✨